Never Too Old To Learn

I learned something about myself this week. I learned that I'm a rich, tea-bagging, redneck, white supremacist. This was certainly an eye-opener. I mean, after all these years, who knew that my views were so extreme.

Now, you may ask what caused this epiphany. Well, turns out that I attended what I thought was a protest against government fiscal policy. You know, increasing taxes and decreasing government services. Planned government deficits that are so huge in scope as to be truly unimaginable. I thought that's what the tea party protests were about. And it certainly seemed like it.

There were signs and speeches decrying the spending and printing of money the country doesn't have, in an effort to save organizations (eg. companies) that made bad financial decisions. Most protestors are unhappy because anybody who has ever put a budget together for the family expenses knows what happens if you spend more then you earn.

Apparently though, protesting these issues is actually a secret code, created by the “conservatives” and broken by the “liberals.” What I was REALLY protesting is having an African-American president and those damn poor people I have to support. What I was ACTUALLY saying is that I'm an ultra-conservative, racist bastard, who has nothing but utter contempt for my fellow man unless he is a lily-white Caucasian who makes more than $250,000 a year.

Who knew?

All this time I've been harboring these dark secrets. Good thing CNN, The Boston Globe, most news outlets, and a good chunk of the blogging population set me straight! I'm obviously a danger to society! In fact, I must be more dangerous then those soldiers returning from Iraq who, as we all know, are terrorists of the worst kind and must be kept under surveillance before they go postal on the "real" Americans.

I gotta tell you. I'm scared. For real. The vitriol resonating throughout the country is getting worse and more hateful. The standard response when this is pointed out is “You said this hateful stuff to us when Bush was President. Now its our turn.”

Let's ignore the fact that “I” and the majority of the U.S. population said nothing of the sort. What I'm hearing is that two wrongs DO make a right. Oh, and some people are always much more "right" than others. Hmm. Seems I've read about this before. I don't remember a happy ending.

More to come.